| C | C/B | Am | C | C/B | Am | |
| Cos he get | s up | in the m | orning and he g | oes to | work at | nine |
| C | C/B | Am | C | C/B | Am | |
| And he co | mes back h | ome at f | ive thirty, gets the s | ame train | every | time |
| C | C/B | Am | C | C/B | Am | |
| Cos his wo | rld is bu | ilt on p | unctual | ity, it n | ever | fails |
| CHORUS: |
| C | C/B | Am | C | C/B | Am | |
| Cos he's | oh | so | good, and he's | oh | so | fine |
| C | C/B | Am | C | C/B | Am | |
| And he's o | h | so h | ealthy in his b | ody and | his | mind |
| F | Em | |
| He's a we | ll respected | man about town |
| F | D | G | G/C | G | |
| Do | ing the best things s | o conservati | vely |
| And his mother goes to meetings while his father pulls the maid |
| And she stirs the tea with councilors while discussing foreign trade |
| And she passes looks as well as Bill's at every suave young man ...CHORUS |
| And he likes his own backyard and he likes his fags the best |
| Cos he's better than the rest and his arm sweat smells the best |
| And he hope to grab his father's loot when Pater passes on ...CHORUS |
| And he plays the stocks and shares and he goes to a regatta |
| He adores the girl next door cos he's dying to get at her |
| But his mother knows the best about the matrimonial stakes ...CHORUS |