Topic: Parent tips

A few days ago my little girl appeared to be having bad dreams, She was uh-ing and tossing and turning . I placed her hand on the side of my face and she stopped. She smiled and continued with her sleep. A few hours later she started again. I reached for her hand, but this time she put my hand on the side of here face and wrapped her arm around mine. Then she smiled and went back to her peaceful dream. (Racheal will turn three on Valentine's Day).

If you were to ever ask as to weather or not there is a heaven then I would answer, " Look into a child's face, feel their breathe upon your skin. Do these things and you'll get your answer."

Racheal loves music, all music (just like Daddy). She will sing along with commercials. She will even beat on the guitar. I see her beating on it and I enjoy watching her having so much fun, but when she's away from it  thoughts of her breaking it come to mind. The music makes her happy and for that I could really care less if the guitar did get broken. I guess that since I can't really play it, that maybe the more she plays with it and becomes familiar with it she'll want to pick up on playing it at a young age.

Does anyone have any tips toward basically anthing involved with parenting. It doesn't matter if it's curing colds or getting them to eat their vegitables, or even to getting them to bed without a round of looking for "the boogy man"?

If you're not happy with what you have...
Then you'll never be happy with what you get...

Re: Parent tips

Love them, treat them with respect, talk to them, teach them right from wrong and spoil them rotten occasionally!

Never forget what you wrote:

eagleeye5851 wrote:

Look into a child's face, feel their breathe upon your skin. Do these things and you'll get your answer

Enjoy

I'm the son of rage and love

Re: Parent tips

Parenting eh?

Well like bonedaddy says, I think the most important thing is talk. It is good to talk and from a young age.

Always make time for them, even when you are having so much fun typing on forums on the computer. Learn to look away from the screen and say "what do you want now"? lol when they tell you, you get off the seat and do as they want, unless it is totally unreasonable.



Ken

ye get some that are cut out for the job and others just get by from pretending

4 (edited by Old Doll 2007-12-03 10:26:44)

Re: Parent tips

Eagleeye,

You darling Man, such a lovely piece to write. You have reminded me of
the first time my babies were handed to me after birth. Such a divine
moment...
Love love love. thats it in a nut shell, sometimes it has to
be tough. if it comes to this ever. Dont lay down the law without first
explaining to your child.  For every action / the reaction. This was drummed
into mine! Talk talk talk to them . ask them about things. Sit and ask, not when your busy. It has to be uninterupted time. Which is hard i know.
If you say something mean it. no mixed messages?
My nephew who is young and profoundly deaf. is hilarious and always up to devilment.
Well with this young Bucaill {Boy} its the same. no mixed
messages.If he does something hes not supposed to, we use the "No sign
to him, but we make a very stern face with it, He gets the message very
quickly. Where if we just make the no sign he feels he can get away with
stuff!
I hope you understand what im trying to impart to you.
always talk to your kids eye to eye. every day tell them you love them.
If i dont see my big grown men i ring them every day to do this.
Im sure they groan at times, but its always there reassurance from me.
you and your lovely wife will always be there Santa Clause" Never forget this.
Get them involved in as many things as possible. they will find there own chosen pleasures and hobbies.
If you have a good guitar, buy your child a cheap one! to belt around with!
mixed message here. She cannot grow up not respecting the value of anything! I have an old guitar here for the Family kids when they visit.
So guidelines must be set!

Good times and blessings to you and yours.
Its a hard but wonderful experience as you both grow together!
it also goes by in the blink of an eye!

So savour the moment

Old Doll.

Why Blend in with the Crowd ? When you were made to stand out !

Re: Parent tips

Lena,
My wife told me the same. She said that time will go by quickly and before you know it they're all grown up. Her oldest son, My step-son is fourteen going on fifteen. I told her that time doesn't go by quickly. Then she compairs her oldests son to our daughter telling me that she thought the same and she can remember when her son was born too. I tell her that she's rushing them, but I know that all things come to pass and someday they'll all be gone with families of their own. Racheal doesn't want her own things, she wants whatever daddy has; My chair, my shoes, my shirts, my supper, my spot on the bed, when I get of the couch she wants my spot. Racheal is a hundred percent daddy's girl. with the exception to cottage cheese she'll even eat everything that I do. I can remember the trips to the O.B., the birth, her birthdays. Of course mine are newer than some others that are reading, but I'm sure that the memories are just as fresh as they just happened for everyone.

If you're not happy with what you have...
Then you'll never be happy with what you get...

6 (edited by Old Doll 2007-12-03 10:25:10)

Re: Parent tips

AbsolutelyNothing wrong

at all with being the doting Dad. But "Lil Miss Rachael" is already asserting

Her powers, around Dad. If she feels she can have anything Dad has
she will use this as a tool around you.

Then you inadvertantly  Allow Missy to isolate your wife, her Mam. Believe
me  Joe, already Missy knows this. Never underestimate the powers
of a woman! from Birth to Death lol

And behind every good man? tra lalalalalalalalalalaaalalalalalalalal.:lol:

I jest! but only on the last line!

Old Doll.

Why Blend in with the Crowd ? When you were made to stand out !

Re: Parent tips

My advice, and although I am not a parent I have some!
Do not care too much about most things.
Such as school. Doing well in school, contrary to popular belief, is NOT the most important thing in the world.
Partying is a GOOD thing.
Curfews are BAD.
Enforcing endless controlling rules on your kids with no real purpose is BAD.
Taking extremely important things like GUITARS as punishment is VERY BAD.


Anyway these are just my, current, firsthand experiences, I'm sure they'll change one day, but right now they seem like solid principles to live by;)

Re: Parent tips

Being a daddy is fantastic - Like Old Doll and Upyerkilt were saying, talking is very important.  Answer their questions honestly and ask them questions also.

Turn off the television and get into the habit of doing things together - playing games, or going for a walk, or making up stories together, or anything you can do to have fun together.

Household routines are important - simple little activities surrounding the mundane daily events of meals and bathing and bedtime.  Help your child learn to help with basic tasks and have fun doing it together.

Singing together is huge fun.  Make up sing-along songs and actions to go along with the words.  I posted a songbook full of Kid Songs:
http://www.chordie.com/publicbooks.php? … ngid=57901
It looks like there are only 4 songs in there, but one of the listings actually has 40+ nursery rhymes and Mother Goose songs.

Being 'Daddy's Girl' is a phase that will come and go - enjoy it while it lasts!

"That darn Pythagorean Comma thing keeps messing me up!"
[url]http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pythagorean_comma[/url]

Re: Parent tips

Hi eagleeye,

Here is some very good advice from Billly Dean. Let Them Be Little: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UA1eqOVH798

Listen learn and enjoy.

Roger

"Do, or do not; there is no try"

Re: Parent tips

Spoil them when they're little.  That way when you say no, it's meaningful.

You can not steer your kids.  You can only point them in the right direction, and aid them with the occasional course correction.

Set high expectations.  Ensure that they understand what their responsibilities are.  Do not let them slack at school.  It will impact them for the rest of their days.

Respect them as people.  Kids are not automatons.  They are little people with their own ideas and agendas.

No child ever learned a thing from your mistakes.  They're going to make their own whether you like it or not.  I teach mine from a young age that there is no sympathy for self inflicted wounds.

Never do for them something they can do for themselves.

Always let them know you love them, and that they are always safe with you.


http://img355.imageshack.us/img355/9677/img00041gm4.jpg
http://img90.imageshack.us/img90/2568/070707jeromesabrina2zn0.jpg

Someday we'll win this thing...

[url=http://www.aclosesecond.com]www.aclosesecond.com[/url]

Re: Parent tips

Daddy Jerome O'Neill!

Lovely Photos!

Beautiful Children. Enjoy enjoy!


Old Doll.

Why Blend in with the Crowd ? When you were made to stand out !

Re: Parent tips

taxman9 wrote:

My advice, and although I am not a parent I have some!
Do not care too much about most things.
Such as school. Doing well in school, contrary to popular belief, is NOT the most important thing in the world.
Partying is a GOOD thing.
Curfews are BAD.
Enforcing endless controlling rules on your kids with no real purpose is BAD.
Taking extremely important things like GUITARS as punishment is VERY BAD.


Anyway these are just my, current, firsthand experiences, I'm sure they'll change one day, but right now they seem like solid principles to live by;)

Please tell me you can't have kids

I'm the son of rage and love

Re: Parent tips

Jerome,
excellent post.

And nice pics.

Ken

ye get some that are cut out for the job and others just get by from pretending

Re: Parent tips

Jerome,
Love the pics.
Family life has definitely changed me.
It's a never ending change.
I'm thankful for what I've got.
My daughter and step-daughters all have their daddy wrapped around their fingers.

I've told my wife that my daughters will be nuns. I'm going to send them to nun school. There will be none of this, none of that, and none of the other.

Someday, I know that the children will all be grown and have their own little families, and I live in denial of this. They're all still babies to me, and for now I just can't envision anyone else holding them. " I Love You Daddy," is a very powerful thing.

If you're not happy with what you have...
Then you'll never be happy with what you get...

Re: Parent tips

Well my children are all grown and gone. They have partners and children of their own. Growing up they have given me and my wife alot joy. Also it must be said a little sadness for who in a normal life can say that bringing up children is always a bed of roses. We have lots of wonderful memories and the grand children are a pure delight. To be a Father and Grand Father has been one of the most wonderful things that has happened in my life.
As for tips on Parenting.
My Children have never ceased to surprise and amaze me though the years.
Never underestimate them or take them for granted.

Ark

Re: Parent tips

eagleeye5851 wrote:

Jerome,

My daughter and step-daughters all have their daddy wrapped around their finger.

Hah!  Yeah.  I'm a sucker, too.  big_smile

I've told my wife that my daughters will be nuns. I'm going to send them to nun school. There will be none of this, none of that, and none of the other.

I teach my girls one cardinal rule about boys.  "Boys are stupid, and easy to replace."  And it's true.  Boys are a fact of life if you have daughters, particularly if you have pretty daughters (and who doesn't?)  What I taught mine was not to base her self worth on a boy, or to get so wrapped up in a boy that she would make sacrifices of her own life for it.  Boys are, after all, stupid, and easy to replace.    If the one you have doesn't work out, there will be a new one on the next bus, guaranteed.  Since she has that attitude, "boy problems" are self correcting.


I Love You Daddy," is a very powerful thing.

Indeed.

Someday we'll win this thing...

[url=http://www.aclosesecond.com]www.aclosesecond.com[/url]

Re: Parent tips

bonedaddy wrote:

Please tell me you can't have kids

Nope, as far as I know I am quite able.  But these are just the rules I want applied to me. My kids, oh man, there gunna be saints or theyll pay for it;)

Re: Parent tips

I think I have learned more about my relationship with God from my kids than any other possible source.

Things that I say to my kids strike me suddenly as applying to myself when thinking of my heavenly Father.  "Slow obedience is disobedience."  Ooops.  Dang.   "I discipline you because I love you.  If I didn't love you, it wouldn't matter to me whether you misbehave."  Uh-huh.  Yeah.  Good to remember.  "Honey.  There is absolutely nothing you can do that could possibly make me not love you.  No matter how grown you get and how tall you are, you will always be my little girl."  What a comfort!  (Well, you know, except I'm a boy and all) 

My girls can push your buttons and get you riled faster than anything.  But I'm learning that the more attention I pour onto them, the less they try.  It's a balancing act.  I work from home sometimes, so I can't be pouring attention onto them and still earn a living.  So they need to learn to obey Daddy, and I need to learn to pay attention to the kiddos when they're behaving so that they won't misbehave to get my attention. 

As far as general advice, well, I don't know.  Remember that they don't know anything.  They're not little adults.  They need to be taught how to be behave, how to solve problems, everything.  Another balance - while teaching them, don't force unnecessary conformity.  They will never be more creative than they are now.  Don't reduce that needlessly.  But then again, it's not OK to let them be non-conformists and explorers if that means they stick a fork ino the electric outlet. 

Good luck. 

- Zurf

Granted B chord amnesty by King of the Mutants (Long live the king).
If it comes from the heart and you add a few beers... it'll be awesome! - Mekidsmom
When in doubt ... hats. - B.G. Dude

Re: Parent tips

one thing that suprised me: for the longest time my son would not use the bathroom. we tried and tried but he just would not use the toilet.so one day i gave him a book with pictures and in five mins he was done. problem solved

Everything is bad including me
But being bad is good policy
Reverend Horton Heat

Re: Parent tips

"Respect is to be earned not demanded"- something papa always said to me.

All You Need is Love smile

Re: Parent tips

selso,
Racheal should long be potty trainned by now. Some days she's really good, but she's got a stubborn streak that you couldn't imagine.

If she don't want to go, then she won't.

Whatever direction she goes it's a hundred percent in that direction. If she's loving, then she's a hundred percent unconditionably loving, but if she wants to be mean, then she's a hundred percent determined to be mean. If she don't want to go to bed then it's a fight a night long, and when she finally does go to bed then she takes cat-naps and in about a half-hour to an hour or so then she's up and running again. About the only cure for this problem is if I go and lay down with her, what usually happens is that I wind up going to sleep to.

If you're not happy with what you have...
Then you'll never be happy with what you get...