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Albert Hammond Bootleg  Half Man Half Biscuit

[Bb]Dragging my guitar 'round ma[F]ternity ward
I was [Bb]in search of the um[F]bilical chord
But it was [Bb]all in vain so I [F]jumped on a train
And when I [Bb]reached my home the [F]kids were on the patio
[Bb]Looking quite upset, so I [F]asked them what was wrong
And they [Ab]said "beware - there's an [Db]Albert Hammond bootleg in the [Ab]house
In there, an [Db]Albert Hammond bootleg in the [Ab]house, some man
Who [Db]introduced himself as Stanley [Ab]Rous came in
And left his [Db]Albert Hammond bootleg in the [Bb]house".[F]
[Bb]Talking to a girl on the [F]south coast of France
She was [Bb]on an 18-30 but I [F]still took a chance
But [Bb]on the last night 'neath the [F]stars of Marseilles
She [Bb]said that Robin Askwith was[F] funny.
[Ab]Oh God, [Db]how I longed for a dangerous [Ab]wave
So I could [Db]surf myself towards an early [Ab]grave
I would [Db]rather talk to plankton than to [Ab]dance with you
I [Db]hope your plane back home's a DC [Bb]10.[F]
[Ab]Oh God, [Db]how I longed for a dangerous [Ab]wave
So I could [Db]surf myself towards an early [Ab]grave
I would [Db]rather talk to plankton than to [Ab]dance with you
I [Db]hope your plane back home's a DC [Ab]10.
[Db] [Ab]  
 
 Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh, oh-oh-oh-oh-oh

[Db] [Ab]  
 
 Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh, oh-oh-oh-oh-oh

[Db] [Ab]  
 
 Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh, oh-oh-oh-oh-oh

Oh-oh-oh-oh-[Db]oh really.[Ab] [Db] [Ab] [Db]
[Db]Out of pure curi[Ab]osity I [Db]dug up Logie [Ab]Baird
And I [Db]asked him what Petrified [Ab]Forests see to [Db]make them all so [Ab]scared.

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