Day Four Of Bill & Dondra's Move

*****What appears to be an official document below is not, although the accident did happen. I just wanted to throw in a little satire/story-telling so as to make it a little light-hearted.*****

My dear friends

I am sure you all are familiar with the signs found in big factories which read......:

_______ DAYS WITH NO WORKPLACE ACCIDENT

Well, we had to reset to zero today. One of the moving crew had an accident.

NAME...........                         Bill Craig

JOB DESCRIPTION........      Musician

LOCATION.............              Primary Residence/Music Room

TIME..............                        4:08:17 PM (Approximately)

BRIEF DESCRIPTION OF WHAT HAPPENDED
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On this date and time I was dismantling my drum kit preparing for packing. I had just dismantled my 22'
Paiste ride cymbal, stowed it  firmly under my right arm and proceeded out of the room when all of a sudden, my right leg buckled under me and down I went, with the cymbal still lodged under my arm.
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DESCRIBE NATURE OF INJURY
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Contusion to right upper rib cage which resulted in a long line representing the outer edge of the cymbal.

Contusion  to the top of the kneecap which is now swollen.

Contusion to the right upper chest wall. Patient states he has pain when he twists his upper torso and when taking a deep breath. Pain level: 6/10.

Laceration to underside of  right pinky. Two stitches required. Patient screamed like a stuck pig

TEST RESULTS

Radiology: Films were made of all contused areas and after thorough examination found to be negative for bone breakage. Patient asked was he  a "good boy" for not breaking any bones and might he have a lollipop? 1 each orange-flavored lollie was issued at no charge.

Orthopaedics: one knee immobilizer installed on patient's right leg. Patient screamed like a stuck pig (again).
After explaining how to walk with an immobilizer on the leg, patient stalked around room singing "Barnacle Bill The Sailor" alternated with "Wooo-wooo-wooo! Look at me! I'm a Pirate!" Hospital Security called.

DISCHARGE

Prescription for Ibuprofen handed to patient's wife who appeared very agitated, rolling eyes and blowing breath out of mouth like most women do by tucking in upper lip, jutting out lower lip and blowing. Agitation, eyes-rolling and breathing like most women can is an unspoken "2 minute warning".

Patient, Patient's mother (sorry! Patient's WIFE) escorted out of hospital with patient tugging on wife's arm loudly squealing, "Now can we go to McDonald's???? You said we could! You SAID!!!!!"

Patient's wife stops dead in her tracks. Head lowered and steam comes out of her ears. All is quiet. Apparently some kind of crisis between the two Craigs is being silently dealt with as the hospital doors hiss shut to the accompaniment of applause, whistles, cat calls and cheers from inside.

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Okay I took some "poetic licence" with my little "tale". Other than the funny stuff all is as it happened. Hope you enjoyed it. We'll be back at it later today

Bill