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Ah.  Then you're going about it wrong. 

You should go buy a solid body electric.   You can find decent bargains pretty much anywhere. 

Same deal with the amp, though.   Small tube amp == happyness and joy.

You can get saddle and tone hole pickups for around $40.

http://www.guitarelectronics.com/catego … classical/

For an amp, you don't need a special amp for acoustics.  Get a good quality 12 or 15 watt tube amp.  It will probably cost you about $100 for that.  You can get nice little Epiphone or Kustom amps in that range for cheap, and they sound fantastic.

I don't know what you mean by "not sounding like the real thing" though.   It will sound like an acoustic guitar through your amp.  I've got two acoustics, one with a piezzo pickup, and it sounds like a real acoustic.

I've always been a huge Brubeck fan.  Take 5 was the album that hooked me into jazz way back in the day.  I was pleased to learn that Dave is still touring.

Did you know he met Paul Desmond while they were fighting at Bastogne under George Patton?  We can infer that if it wasn't for Hitler, "Take 5" would have never happened. 

Well, your first entry into this thread was

"That helps how? Practice is the obvious answer but it's worth nothing if you don't say what to practice."

Which was directed not at the OP, but me.  So you're not gonna get a whole lot of sympathy about that "insult me" whine.    There's a really simple rule about not starting fires if you can't take the heat.  And clearly, you can't.

I haven't said a thing about your musical knowledge.   If you had a clue, you'd know why.    You're completely ignorant in a whole lot of other ways, mostly having to do with me, and this board.  And if you'd shut your pie hole and read a bit, you could cure that.  But I'm gonna guess you won't.

But please do show me that "fact."

I'll wait patently for you to point it out.

Which fact might that be, sweetie?

Go ahead and read a bit.  Then get back to me. 

But really, your cotton is really discombobulated.  You aught to fix it.

Once you've been around here a little longer, you'll understand why what you're telling me is nothing short of laughable.

Advice to you.  As a new guy, you should rearrange your cotton for the first little while.   That is, take it out of your ears, and stick it in your mouth.

Because most people don't practice.  That's how.

"Is there an easy way to play just like Edie Van Halen?"

The answer is no, there isn't.  All there is is practice.   There is nothing else, especially in the beginning.   If you aren't willing to dedicate yourself to that, then you may as well take up air guitar.

As silly as it sounds, that is excellent advice.  I've always found that I play better if I'm relaxed, too.  Steady breathing helps with that.

It's not really all that.  Three strikes applies to certain felony crimes.  It's usually only applies to violent crimes.  If you rob a liquor store once, they give you some rehabilitation.  Twice, and you go to prison.  Three times and it's pretty much obvious that you're unredeemable, and a hazard to society.

As an American, I like three strikes laws.

This is actually for the bennefit of the accused.  We give the accused every opportunity to appeal the sentence, and give them full access to the court system before carrying out sentence.  We don't just put them there for years because we can.  We put them there, and it takes years for their cases to wind through the courts.   If you're going to kill a guy, you want it to be right.

This was actually two different cases.  The criminal system has a different standard of proof than our civil courts do.  In a criminal case, the standard of proof is "beyond a reasonable doubt."  In a civil case, it is "the preponderance of evidence."

So the prosecutor in the criminal case failed to prove guilt beyond a reasonable doubt.  When the Goldman's sued OJ in civil court, it was the preponderance of evidence that caused them to come back with the guilty verdict.  It's why he has to pay them money, but doesn't have to go to jail.

Don't know about that.  I'd check with US customs and border security. 

The first 10 were written when they ratified the Constitution.  The latest was ratified in 1992.

We often talk about the Bill of Rights as the 1st 10 amendments.  What most American's don't know is that there were actually 12 amendments proposed in 1789.   The one that was finally ratified in 1992 was one of them.  It only took 200 years! 

No.  Lawyers all have to go to law school, and pass the bar exam.  Then they are free to do what they want.  They can open their own practice, work at a firm, or anything.  Generally, this involves capitalizing on other peoples misery.  Lawyers are all scumbags.  Even mine.

Here we have the right to be confronted by our accusers.  We have no trial in absentia, or trial by proxy.  If I am not in the court room, there can be no trial if I am charged.  Anyone charged in America has access to the American legal system, which is based upon the presumption of innocence.  It is the states duty to prove guilt.  The accused is assumed to be innocent of all charges until a verdict is returned.

Corrina Corrina - Whoever wrote Corrina Corrina (Come on! It's a standard!)

Malibu!  Southern California in the late 50s and early 60s is pretty much ground zero when it comes to surf music.

Dick Dale!  I've got some of his stuff on '45s.