Topic: Embarrassing Moments

In the songwiting section SouthPaw41L admitted that:

I once drove my motorcycle into a telephone pole while looking back at a station wagon full of young gals from Tennessee. Lucky for me the folks who lived by the pole I hit were doing some remodelling to their home and had some sheet rock tilted against the pole I ran into. I escaped with only minor injuries to myself and motorcycle but my pride was almost totaled.
There, I told you mine now you tell us yours!

Is anyone else willing to share their most embarrassing moment?

OK I had better reveal mine after that. Whist out with some friends when I first came to Portugal I went, in a rush, to a loo. On the way I saw the sign "Homem" and read it as "Women" and so went flying into the other one. Homem is Portugues for MEN. Ooops. I came out a darn sight faster than I went in and of course my friends were all laughing their socks off and kept reminding me for weeks.

Roger

"Do, or do not; there is no try"

Re: Embarrassing Moments

i went to some public toilets and there was eight blokes lined up waiting to go in the cubicles "together" i stood at the stall and i could'nt pee so i went outside behind a bush,so every time we pass them in the car its always daddys favorite toilets...

love is life ,life is for love,keep a true heart and live life to the full....stay cool

Re: Embarrassing Moments

I'll keep this short, but suffice to say that last year I drunkenly (isn't it always?) managed to lock myself out of my flat in nothing more than a pair of boxer shorts....my masterplan to get back in then resulted in me being outside of my building when the front door also slammed, leaving me to spend a rather chilly Saturday night on the streets of Paisley frantically trying (and failing) to wake my neighbours to get them to let me in.

I get cold even thinking about it!!

All I got, is a red guitar, three chords and the truth

Re: Embarrassing Moments

Walked backwards into a wall full of expensive photography merchanidise, knocking several shelves akimbo when a particularly attractive customer came in and asked for my boss.  I was trying to get to the hallway entrance without taking my eyes off her.  Fortunately, I broke nothing by my pride. 

- Big D

Granted B chord amnesty by King of the Mutants (Long live the king).
If it comes from the heart and you add a few beers... it'll be awesome! - Mekidsmom
When in doubt ... hats. - B.G. Dude

Re: Embarrassing Moments

bud_wiser wrote:

I'll keep this short, but suffice to say that last year I drunkenly (isn't it always?) managed to lock myself out of my flat in nothing more than a pair of boxer shorts....my masterplan to get back in then resulted in me being outside of my building when the front door also slammed, leaving me to spend a rather chilly Saturday night on the streets of Paisley frantically trying (and failing) to wake my neighbours to get them to let me in.

I get cold even thinking about it!!

I'm sure I read about this in the Paisley Daily Express.

It's the stuff you do, or in my case say, when you 1st meet somone that are the ones that you're always reminded of. The 1st time I went to my girlfried's house to meet her Mum and have dinner I was asked if i would like a slice of bread. Me being the hungry love struck young man said I'd like two. Which I never ate cos I was too full. During the meal the subject of SMASH (instant mashed potato) came up and I went off on a rant about how I hated it....

Needless to say, my future mother-in-law (yes, I married the girlfriend) had run out of potatoes and resorted to instant mash as a last resort. I was quietly told of the potato shortage later in the evening and have been constantly reminded ever since.

Is anything really made up of zeros and ones??

Re: Embarrassing Moments

LOL one time on a hunting trip I accidentally shot myself in the foot. Pretty embarrassing. Went out the next year and got me a deer though. Gotta love that venison chilli.

You have to forget about what other people say; when you're supposed to die, when you're supposed to be lovin'. You have to forget about all these things. You have to go on and be crazy. Craziness is like heaven.
                                                        -James Marshall Hendrix

Re: Embarrassing Moments

I had a very embarrassing moment last night that will be with me for a day or two.

I was cooking my evening meal, baked jacket potato, in my oven and had just grated some cheese to top it with. As I had opened a new pack of cheese I needed some cling film to wrap it in. This is kept in a small cupboard alongside the oven but on opening it I found that I had visitors - ants.

Now in Portugal there are two types of ant, one is about 6 or 7 mm long and is quite a friendly type that will wander in one's place and nod his head or wave a leg as he passes by but most of the time he is outdoors. He is usually on his own unless he has come to take one of the cat's biscuits to feed the youngsters and then he will bring two mates to help carry the load, which is fine.

The other type of ant is less than 1 mm and is a different kettle of fish altogether. When he comes it is mob handed with several thousand of his mates and is most unwelcome and this was what I had been invaded with. Prepared for such an eventuality I have a very large aerosol of insect spray which not only clobbers the little blighters it prevents others from following after the initial attack.

Armed with my trusty weapon I went into battle and was spraying the invaders left right and centre and pulling shelves out at the same time to take better aim. I was definitely gaining the upper hand when I sprung the surprise attack (well it certainly was a surprise to me). The spray's propellant and oxygen had reached critical mass and was ignited my the oven. There was an explosion and a flash fire and suddenly I had a flame thrower in my hand which was rapidly discarded.

The upshot is, apart from some superficial burns, I now have no hair on my arm and legs, my eyebrows are practically none existant and my thining hair is even thiner and shorter. I will probably have to stay at home for a day or two until the hair has recovered somewhat.

I do not have any ants any longer though.

"Do, or do not; there is no try"

Re: Embarrassing Moments

Oh Roger, Poor Roger - - - like some kind of an alchemist who's experiment has gone badly wrong!  I can just picture you valiently defending your castle from the teeming horde of invaders.  I can imagine the sound of all that propellant and insecticide igniting is rather memorable - was it more of a WHUMP or a BOOM?  Glad that you survived with only superficial singes - I am cramping up from laughing right now.

By the way, Roger - over here in the US, when there is an explosion in a trailer (caravan) it is usually because some crazed redneck was 'cooking' crystal meth - - - - you sure that was a baked potato you were fixing, Roger?  Instead of being a dashing British gentleman, are you actually a snaggle-toothed redneck meth head?

"That darn Pythagorean Comma thing keeps messing me up!"
[url]http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pythagorean_comma[/url]

Re: Embarrassing Moments

Roger Guppy,
you never told what i thought was the best bit of the story..

To fill you all in! Roger emailed me to say what had happened. He also said,
As he took the Aerosol Spray out his cat was watching him..
His Cat who i assume cannot read, saw this human being with an Aerosol and
exposed flame and quickly left the building.. Clever Clever Cat.

His animal instinct kicked in!  8 lives left, but he wasnt going Guppies way!!

Is it any wonder i love nature and all its wonder, they never forget how to survive..
I laughed so much at the whole scene last night, i was belly sore today.
All i can say Roger, I did see your photo you sent, it does look sore, and your hair will grow back { well Maybe } But thank God you were wearing your Jocks?
Or we may have had to change your name to "Senorina Rogeda" lol lol lol.

GET WELL SOON.. lol lol lol, Oh God I still think its hilarious!

Old Doll.

Why Blend in with the Crowd ? When you were made to stand out !

Re: Embarrassing Moments

my worst moment was forgetting the words to a song I should have known by heart, sung it in front of about 30 people.  recovered pretty well, dont think they really noticed. just one of those oops moments

Everything is bad including me
But being bad is good policy
Reverend Horton Heat

Re: Embarrassing Moments

Hey Selso,

I, and I am sure anyone else who has performed for an audience, can sympathise with that one, but you are also right that your errors rarely get noticed. I once missed my cue for a verse (well there was an extremely pretty young lady smiling at me) so sooner than come in a bar or two late I just missed out the whole first line of the song and came in on the second as though it was intentional.

James I am not sure what 'crystal meths' is (being the innocent that I am) so I will assume it is either an illegal drink or drug. I am sorry to be a bore but it was just potato. As for the WHOMP or BOOM, well being so close up and personal I was temporarily deafened so I cannot tell. I did however have two pictures blown off the wall and a lampshade ended up on the floor.

Helena I did not tell the bit about Henry (the cat) as I did not want everyone to know that he is more intelligent than I.

Roger

"Do, or do not; there is no try"

Re: Embarrassing Moments

I had an experience similar to bud_wiser's back 30 years ago when I was living in a highrise apartment building in Chicago.  Very late one winter night I took some garbage down the hall to the garbage chute.  Was wearing only my woolen socks and long underwear.  The door locked automatically behind me.

Sat for a couple of hours in the stairwell shivering.  All my neighbors were recent immigrants and nobody else spoke English.  The building supe demanded bribes for everything and I had no cash.  Eventually decided to run three blocks to where a friend lived.

The streets and alley's were covered in grimy nasty city snow.  The cold wind roared off of Lake Michigan.  I nearly froze my gonads off sprinting down the streets and through the alleys and crouching behind dumpsters as traffic came near.  Slipped on some ice and fell.  My feet got gouged up pretty good.

Made it to my friend's place and then had to throw snowballs at his window until he finally woke up and let me in.  Crashed on his couch.  He lent me some shoes and clothes and a couple of bucks (to give the building supe) in the morning.  He also laughed at me - can't blame him.

I still have that set of long underwear and now I laugh a bit whenever I put them on.

"That darn Pythagorean Comma thing keeps messing me up!"
[url]http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pythagorean_comma[/url]

Re: Embarrassing Moments

kinda had an experiance like james's but i was about ten or 11 . we lived in germany at the time and it was during winter. went out of our apartment complex yo check the mail or something in my underware. there was aabout a foot and a half of snow on the ground and the door slamed shut on me. stood out there for nearly 15 mins before the the people who lived up stairs let me in. i littarly almost froze to death!!

Everything is bad including me
But being bad is good policy
Reverend Horton Heat

Re: Embarrassing Moments

An old workmates sister who happens to be a model lived round the corner from me for a while. We were always winding him up about it, saying we saw her on page 3 of The Sun (topless modeling for those outwith the UK) and cutting the heads of the page 3 girls and swapping them for a previously purloined pic of his Sister! Childish, I know....but amusing nonetheless.   Note: she never done glamour modeling at all.

One day when he was dropping me off from work his sister was walking past, so purely to wind him up a wee bit I turned round and started walking backwards looking at her whilst making the obligatory 'PHWOOOAAAR' faces......turned round and walked straight into a lampost!!

Lying on my arse with my workmate and his Sister both laughing hysterically at me, my 'wind up' didn't seem quite as amusing. lol


Craig.

Blind acceptance is a sign, of stupid fools who stand in line.  John Lydon.

'Mod' is a shorter word for 'young, beautiful and stupid' - we've all been there." - Pete Townshend.

Re: Embarrassing Moments

Grade 9/1969 It was time for our yearbook picture.I made sure that I wore decent clothing that day cuz I wanted to look good. Nice dark brown pants with a matching brown shirt.My hair was longer then,shoulder length and I felt good with myself.
Now me being of shorter stature when it came to group pictures I was always front and center.I took my spot with the rest of my classmates and smiled proudly cuz I was in "Grade Nine".Finally when the pictures were printed in the yearbook I anxiously jumped to our page.To my shock and horror the picture turned out too perfect cuz there I was front and center wearing my dark brown pants with a decent rip right where you don't want one.No such thing as colored underwear back then....nothing but white.
Needless to say I took a lot of ribbing from my classmates and I imagine the rest of the school had a good chuckle too. Man...it was a long year after that.
Don't know why the photographer didn't say anything,he could have saved me a lot of grief LOL
Anyways I look back on it now fondly and with a smile.
So with all the young Chordies that have joined this site,keep this thread in mind for your yearbook pictures.Make Sure.....Make Darn Sure...Make Darn Darn Sure.

Thanks for the thread and the memories

KAP54 smile

Just Keepin on Keepin on
Martin DC15E
Cort MR710F
Squire Strat (Chinese)

Re: Embarrassing Moments

hey Roger are you SURE that you were born in 1947 didn;t your Mama ever tell you that flame throwers are DANGEROUS. I am glad to hear that you are OK tho' it's taken me quite a while to stop larfing. It sounds like a MontyPython skit.As for your hair long short thick or thin at 61 who cares. Keep on rocking. and remember that animals feel pain too.

Keep on Rocking and remember Animals Feel Pain Too.

Re: Embarrassing Moments

Well Buvvy,

Now you mention it my Mum did tell me that fire was dangerous so I guess that counts. Mind you the MOST dangerous thing in our house as a kid was doing what mum said not to do lol

I remember seeing James Bond killing a snake with an aerosol flame thower and thinking it was cool. When it happened to me it was not so cool I can assure you

Lastly and most importantly:

As for your hair long short thick or thin at 61 who cares.

I CARE!! tongue lol wink

But if my little adventure brought a smile to your face then I am glad.

Roger

"Do, or do not; there is no try"

Re: Embarrassing Moments

Back on the public toilet theme. Many years ago i walking into the mens toilet and stood there doing my business, and this guy came and stood at the adjacent urinal. And as you do, i starting up a casual conversation with this guy. Well when "he" replied, I literally wet myself - it was a very nice looking blond girl standing there smiling sweetly, totally unselfconscious about the situation.

I totally lost my usual cool self and fled...

"War never determines who is right , only who is left"
"Democracy is the right to protest about  the lack of it!"

Re: Embarrassing Moments

I took my son into the city to buy him a new football..back at the bus terminal he happily bounced his new football..whilst sat waiting for the bus a lady sat next to me on the seat..you couldn't help but notice that she had the best beard i've ever seen in my life, Grizzle Adams himself would have been proud to have cultivated such a growth of facial hair..My son immediately took an interest in this strange site and stood starring at the spectacle ..This is the point in time i start thinking 'any second now he is going to turn to me and say something' so rather than embarrass myself the lady and all the other waiting passengers i thought i would try and kill the moment and blurted out....SON STOP FUSSING AND GO PLAY WITH YOUR.....BEARD.....( i of course meant to say ball)

EVER FELT LIKE DIGGING A HOLE AND BURYING YOUR HEAD IN IT?   I DID ...

Ride Safe!

Re: Embarrassing Moments

I would have to say the most embarassing moment in my whole life occured when I was 16 and to this day i wont forget it.This is something that proberly happend to all male teenagers i was sitting in a new class at the start of the semester and a new teacher asked a question and looking at the attendence sheet she called my name to come to the front of the class and answer the question,normally that would not be a problem but i had my eye on a very voluptious female across from me and i was sexually arroused so I refused to come to the front of the class when asked to I was threatend with a trip to the principals office and detention so reluctently i walked to the front of the class and there in all my pubesent manhood i stood and it wasn't a banana in my pocket either lol i will not devuldge the nickname I was bestowed but it has to do with the first part of my last name lol

"Growing old is not for sissies"

Re: Embarrassing Moments

Tough gig to follow Russ... :lol:Thanks for sharing.
KAP54 smile

Just Keepin on Keepin on
Martin DC15E
Cort MR710F
Squire Strat (Chinese)

Re: Embarrassing Moments

Russell_Harding wrote:

I would have to say the most embarassing moment in my whole life occured when I was 16 and to this day i wont forget it.This is something that proberly happend to all male teenagers i was sitting in a new class at the start of the semester and a new teacher asked a question and looking at the attendence sheet she called my name to come to the front of the class and answer the question,normally that would not be a problem but i had my eye on a very voluptious female across from me and i was sexually arroused so I refused to come to the front of the class when asked to I was threatend with a trip to the principals office and detention so reluctently i walked to the front of the class and there in all my pubesent manhood i stood and it wasn't a banana in my pocket either lol i will not devuldge the nickname I was bestowed but it has to do with the first part of my last name lol

Been there Russ......I found that a swift "Thwack" with a handy ruler always did the trick....that way then the class will only need to wonder why you're crying and not worry that you're about to hold the place up!

All I got, is a red guitar, three chords and the truth

Re: Embarrassing Moments

I think i'll skip the "thawack" after 60 I found that i welcome this celestial event with open arms lol

bud_wiser wrote:
Russell_Harding wrote:

I would have to say the most embarassing moment in my whole life occured when I was 16 and to this day i wont forget it.This is something that proberly happend to all male teenagers i was sitting in a new class at the start of the semester and a new teacher asked a question and looking at the attendence sheet she called my name to come to the front of the class and answer the question,normally that would not be a problem but i had my eye on a very voluptious female across from me and i was sexually arroused so I refused to come to the front of the class when asked to I was threatend with a trip to the principals office and detention so reluctently i walked to the front of the class and there in all my pubesent manhood i stood and it wasn't a banana in my pocket either lol i will not devuldge the nickname I was bestowed but it has to do with the first part of my last name lol

Been there Russ......I found that a swift "Thwack" with a handy ruler always did the trick....that way then the class will only need to wonder why you're crying and not worry that you're about to hold the place up!

"Growing old is not for sissies"

Re: Embarrassing Moments

Russell_Harding wrote:

I would have to say the most embarassing moment in my whole life occured when I was 16 and to this day i wont forget it.This is something that proberly happend to all male teenagers i was sitting in a new class at the start of the semester and a new teacher asked a question and looking at the attendence sheet she called my name to come to the front of the class and answer the question,normally that would not be a problem but i had my eye on a very voluptious female across from me and i was sexually arroused so I refused to come to the front of the class when asked to I was threatend with a trip to the principals office and detention so reluctently i walked to the front of the class and there in all my pubesent manhood i stood and it wasn't a banana in my pocket either lol i will not devuldge the nickname I was bestowed but it has to do with the first part of my last name lol

I think that a lot of the men here have experienced similar situations. A classmate of mine had something very similar happen to him as well...except I hit puberty when "zubas" (you know, those sweatpants with fancy patterns all over them) were the "in" thing. Poor guy...he never wore anything but jeans from that day forward. lol

"Do or do not, there is no try." Yoda

25 (edited by dino48 2008-07-18 04:45:59)

Re: Embarrassing Moments

Hi roger,Igot a good laugh out of that.We used too do warm up exercises In phys ed,and when the girls ran by it never failed ,someone would get thier gym shorts pulled down by someone behind them.I had this happen too me several times. We were lucky the coach was laughing at the same time he was chewing us out. Hey rodger next time you get ants use some windex window cleaner,or almost any kind of cleaneron them ie: 409 or any kitchen bath cleaner,they work well.

my papy said son your going too drive me too drinking if you dont stop driving that   Hot  Rod  Lincoln!! Cmdr cody and his lost planet airman