1 (edited by Peatle Jville 2020-06-13 03:36:04)

Topic: Hope Your Still Mine

I wrote this poem rock blues song  Hope Your Still Mine yesterday after life here In New Zealand went back normal. It is about a young man hoping the Gal he likes is still interested in him. Apart from our borders been closed to overseas people still we are now free to move about and mingle. No more temperature checks and wearing of face masks when I visit my 99 year old mum. Though it has only been in the last two weeks that I could visit her with it being for only half an hour and having to keep a two meter distance from her and have my hands sanitised. There has been no reported cases of Covid now for nineteen days and no active cases here in NZ picked up through testing. Now it is time to rebuild our shattered economy. I will attach me doing a very rough version of it on YouTube.        Hope you are all keeping safe and well.
                                                                                        . https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eUVcS9yIp4E

Hope Your Still Mine

Hello honey how are you now we are at level one.
I got a fire deep inside not of the sickness kind.
Now we are at level one you can give me a hug if you like.
You can get up close if you want and I’m feeling fine.
Yeah there is winter outside but the sun still shines.
Yeah I’ve got a temperature not of the sick kind.
Yeah you can get up close you can give me a hug.
Cause I’m feeling fine.
Now we are  at level one everything is fine.
You can go out have a laugh.
Get up close like most.
Yeah you are mine baby.
If that’s alright with you.
Yeah I’ve got a temperature.
A hot kind of temperature.
All for you.
Yeah I’ve got a temperature but I’m only thirty six degrees.
Its of the healthy kind. 
Now we are at level one I hope your still mine.

Re: Hope Your Still Mine

I really like that!

I may send it to  a lady friend.     

“It’s like a Jab, you got the squeeze and you got the attack, you got the guitar and the emotion behind the song. 
You can plug into a Marshall, but if you are not attacking it,  it's just going to sound so-so.  If the song doesn't grove, you are just bashing through chords” .
-- Mike Ness,  Social Distortion

Re: Hope Your Still Mine

beamer liked that so much he said it twice..lol

i also liked it. does Maree? (i hope i spelt that right?) is it about your lovely wife or just imagination? don't worry i wont tell...     

Ask not what Chordie can do for you, but what you can do for Chordie.

4 (edited by Peatle Jville 2020-06-13 03:34:25)

Re: Hope Your Still Mine

Beamer cheers I hope your Lady friend likes it.

Phill thank you  got Maree's name right. The song is about a  young local lad I know  and his feelings for a gal just before everything got shut down.  In recent years here in our part of the world  there were more girls than boys been born. This young man when he got to the age of  loving woman was  spoilt for choice but after a while the novelty wore of and he wanted that someone special. Just before Covid came our way he met this lass who he fell madly in love with but just as they were getting closer the lockdown meant that their growing relationship became a bit distant due the lockdown. Now we are back to mixing together in NZ he was feeling a bit nervous about  the future of their relationship. Some of the lyrics are a bit cryptic but I hope they make sense. I was trying to acoustic rock it up a bit. Unfortunately the recording is not the best on my laptop.

Re: Hope Your Still Mine

Nice recording Peatle. I don't think it's so much rock and roll as a blues rhythm, but that's okay, your performance is spot on.

Got to feel sorry for youngsters not being able to strut their stuff for the last few months, hopefully that's all over now? Sounds like a title for a song, I wonder if anyone's thought of that?
More girls than boys....I knew I was in the wrong country growing up!!!! Lol     

Ask not what Chordie can do for you, but what you can do for Chordie.

6 (edited by Peatle Jville 2020-06-13 11:20:54)

Re: Hope Your Still Mine

Phill  for me it is like the Dr John song "Right Place, Wrong Time" I got Maree so I don't need to worry.  I like your title for a song More Girls Than Boys.  I will add a couple of lines and leave it up to someone else to add the rest or just delete my added bits.

What your worried about son.
In my days it was hard to get  one.
All that free candy.
All so handy.
Just waiting for you.
Odds in your favour with so many different flavours.
With more girls than boys.
I got good news.
You get to choose.
The candy shop is well stocked for you..

Re: Hope Your Still Mine

here's my attempt at a second verse...

what you worried 'bout dad?
you let go the good one you had.
all that free candy.
all so handy.
on hand for you.
but you lost her cos you were greedy.
so many others and you so needy.
i got bad news.
you don't get to chose.
the candy shop is closed for you.     

Ask not what Chordie can do for you, but what you can do for Chordie.

8 (edited by Peatle Jville 2020-06-14 09:02:05)

Re: Hope Your Still Mine

Wow Phill that is brilliant a Cat Stevens father and son thing going on there.
What you worried 'bout Mum?
He wasn't much with his sums.
To lose a good one like you.
He had nectar and honey.
His life  so sunny.
All that candy  so handy.
For someone so randy.
His appetite  so greedy..
A man  so seedy.
Quick and speedy.
Looking for lovers like you.
After  bad reviews he received the  news.
Those clever moves were now bad news.
No longer able to chose.
The candy shop was closed to him.

Re: Hope Your Still Mine

I have noticed on my own topics things are getting double posted.  anyone else notice? I did  clean up and get rid of the  repeat     

“It’s like a Jab, you got the squeeze and you got the attack, you got the guitar and the emotion behind the song. 
You can plug into a Marshall, but if you are not attacking it,  it's just going to sound so-so.  If the song doesn't grove, you are just bashing through chords” .
-- Mike Ness,  Social Distortion

Re: Hope Your Still Mine

I haven't noticed it on mine but it does make your stats look better...lol     

Ask not what Chordie can do for you, but what you can do for Chordie.

Re: Hope Your Still Mine

Peatle, now it's a three way? On first reading I thought your last verse was too long but I can see now that the last four lines could be a chorus or a bridge?

With all these days of doing nothing I've hardly picked up my guitar, must start practicing again.     

Ask not what Chordie can do for you, but what you can do for Chordie.

12 (edited by Peatle Jville 2020-06-16 06:35:38)

Re: Hope Your Still Mine

Awesome Phill if there is anything in there you can use that would be real good. I agree I added too many words that don't work. To  hear any bits of it in a song of yours would be something I would enjoy.