1 (edited by Peatle Jville 2021-04-15 20:19:15)

Topic: Last Light Reflections

For  a  small part of my childhood I lived with my family in Fiji my mothers country of birth. I  use to love how the old Fijian people some of them my relatives would use things in nature to impart their philosophy’s on life or use the environment as a way of uplifting peoples spirits when life was going wrong. Often the story would be told in a poetic form with a little song to finish what was told. So rather than write this poem down you will have to listen to it if your interested  as writing it down takes away from the oral tradition. It is how they  would have told  us a poetic story extending that thought every cloud has a silver lining. So for this one using English language I have become a Fijian elder and story teller from my childhood. The setting for this one is here in Wellington New Zealand starting at the Cook Strait. 
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0QPmuoJWudw

Re: Last Light Reflections

Peatle - Very well done ! I especially like the song at the end - beautiful and heartfelt.   Jim     

Your vision is not limited by what your eye can see, but what your mind can imagine.
Make your life count, and the world will be a better place because you tried.

"Use the talents you possess, for the woods would be very silent if no birds sang except only the the best." - Henry Van Dyke

Re: Last Light Reflections

and you do this off the top of your head? you are a very clever individual with a very individual style. rock on Pedr     

Ask not what Chordie can do for you, but what you can do for Chordie.

Re: Last Light Reflections

Jim and Phill  thank you for taking time to check out my video. I appreciate your feedback and kind words. The cloud shots were taken over a period of fifteen minutes with my phone from the veranda at home of the same spot on the ridge of Mount Kau kau using  different lens magnification..  I think the images were most probably the best part of the video. The poem story side doesn't necessary fit what would be a standard modern rhyming way of poetry. The song is something I might work on at a future date  as a song for young kids.     

Re: Last Light Reflections

Pedr,
why worry about rhyming? It's the story your poem tells that counts and the way it's told and both those criteria are reached. Outside of the South seas, your style is unique so don't be discouraged by apparent lack of interest. If it wasn't for the likes of you and Jim this forum would only be frequented by people that can't get their song book to work, and what a waste that would be?
I look forward to hearing the finished version of your song.

Piri     

Ask not what Chordie can do for you, but what you can do for Chordie.

Re: Last Light Reflections

Nicely  presented  Pete .Powerful words with  a  lot  of   meaning   ,well  done     

Re: Last Light Reflections

poetry usualy not my thing but thats pretty good     

out of tune out of key and out of touch

8 (edited by Peatle Jville 2021-04-16 22:18:48)

Re: Last Light Reflections

Cheers Mojo, Grah, Phill and Jim.



Funny thing when I posted this.

I thought no one will post a reply or follow this.

Very few would understand or get this.

Even though it is only four of you.

Who it got through to.

For some reason that is far better than what I had expected.

Cheers and thank you it is real good to hear from you.

As of this time now  we have four replies.

Thank you guys.

If four is good enough for the Beatles.

That will have to do for me.

I will have a cup of tea.

Go to the garden eat my pea.

Sorry only word I could rhyme with tea.

Notice it is pea not pee.

I would never take the.     

I know it’s a bit cryptic.

I will leave it up to you.

To find words to rhyme with this.

Maybe my next post will be better than this.

I am thankful to all who reply to this.

I’m not trying to be  mysterious or obscure.

And if I am.

I’m sure there is a cure.

To those who find me boring.

I'm sorry I got you snoring.

Re: Last Light Reflections

to rhyme with tea
i must disagree
it very easy as you can see
now i, am no poet wanna be
of this i am sure we all agree
so got to the garden and have your tea
beneath shade of any old tree
but keep an eye  for honey bees
they may fly into your tea 


sorry couldnt help myself     

out of tune out of key and out of touch

10 (edited by Peatle Jville 2021-04-18 08:15:29)

Re: Last Light Reflections

Mojo that is brilliant made me laugh  your real good.
To bee or not to be a honey bee circling my tea under the shade of an old oak tree. 
With Shakespeare in hand.
I heard the owner of the proper tea.
Yelling at me. 
That is no place to have a pea.
Leave my  old oak tree.
Get of my property.
With the words of Shakespeare ring in my ears.
To bee or not to be.
Or was it.
To pea or not to pee.
I heard  Paul Mack Cart A Knee voice,
singing let it bee
or was it  let it pee.

Re: Last Light Reflections

would make doctor  Seuss proud lol


Peatle Jville wrote:

Mojo that is brilliant made me laugh  your real good.
To bee or not to be a honey bee circling my tea under the shade of an old oak tree. 
With Shakespeare in hand.
I heard the owner of the proper tea.
Yelling at me. 
That is no place to have a pea.
Leave my  old oak tree.
Get of my property.
With the words of Shakespeare ring in my ears.
To bee or not to be.
Or was it.
To pea or not to pee.
I heard  Paul Mack Cart A Knee voice,
singing let it bee
or was it  let it pee.

     

out of tune out of key and out of touch

Re: Last Light Reflections

ok more bad limericks kind of a Shakespeare meets DR. Seuss meets ....well me
my apologies in advance

to pee or not not pee
underneath yon oak tree
this the question that i ask of thee
i am in a quandary as you can see

should i pee from my front stoop
most certainly i should not poop
among the bushes should i pee
i think not for thorns there be
should i pee along the fence
to mark my land and leave my scent
should i simply pee on the ground
or in the grass to make no sound
where to pee i must make a stance
for if i wait to long i will pee pants     

out of tune out of key and out of touch

Re: Last Light Reflections

Great entertainment,thanks to all of you.     

The King Of Audio Torture

Re: Last Light Reflections

brilliant Mojo     

Ask not what Chordie can do for you, but what you can do for Chordie.

Re: Last Light Reflections

pretty awesome boys ! 

surprised there wasn't a pickle thrown in the rhyme somewhere     

Your vision is not limited by what your eye can see, but what your mind can imagine.
Make your life count, and the world will be a better place because you tried.

"Use the talents you possess, for the woods would be very silent if no birds sang except only the the best." - Henry Van Dyke

16 (edited by Peatle Jville 2021-04-19 08:41:31)

Re: Last Light Reflections

mojo01 wrote:

ok more bad limericks kind of a Shakespeare meets DR. Seuss meets ....well me
my apologies in advance

to pee or not not pee
underneath yon oak tree
this the question that i ask of thee
i am in a quandary as you can see

should i pee from my front stoop
most certainly i should not poop
among the bushes should i pee
i think not for thorns there be
should i pee along the fence
to mark my land and leave my scent
should i simply pee on the ground
or in the grass to make no sound
where to pee i must make a stance
for if i wait to long i will pee pants

Mojo that is absolutely brilliant.

Re: Last Light Reflections

my grass is green
as green as a bean
a green bean of course
a green bean running
a runner bean, therefore
a flyer in the airforce
a pilot in a grey suit
not a business man in his flute ( cockney rhyming slang for suit)
a flute to make the sound toot
a journey takes it's own route
or maybe just a plant root
or just a shoot of grass     

Ask not what Chordie can do for you, but what you can do for Chordie.

18 (edited by Peatle Jville 2021-04-20 08:46:21)

Re: Last Light Reflections

Phill Williams wrote:

my grass is green
as green as a bean
a green bean of course
a green bean running
a runner bean, therefore
a flyer in the airforce
a pilot in a grey suit
not a business man in his flute ( cockney rhyming slang for suit)
a flute to make the sound toot
a journey takes it's own route
or maybe just a plant root
or just a shoot of grass


Thank you Phill I really enjoyed the way you wrote that with good humour this has been really entertaining for me yours and Mojos clever feedback.. In the spirit of joining in this and  having some more fun with words, Phill  I will have another go at this as a word play on your four last words, " a shoot of grass" as my second sentence starting point and see where it takes me. I will take on the persona  of a character who doesn't want to use a word that rhymes with grass.



As I sat on our cut grass.

A shoot of grass.

Shot up into my bus pass pocket.

Not the part that sits on the grass.

And that a be.

Not that part of my anatomy,

Some say is pronounced with an ah and ends with a is.

For now that a be.

All from me.

Today I have had my hours in the garden.

Time for me to head inside.

Take of my dirty jeans.

Nothing obscene.

Just time with my queen.

Who loves my green beans.

My long-suffering missus.

Drinking lemonade and lime.

We are taking our time.

Happily, me and my cheese and kisses.

Talk about Beirut.

While eating our hot beetroot.

Plus, some fruit.

Time to get changed into my whistle and toot.

It could be a hoot.

As the rubbery dub beckons. (Pub)

With the help of natural gas from my baked beans.

The air force the beer.

Out of my glass.

I sat down and talked about my past.

The barmaid with a wink and a smile makes a pass.

That makes me almost fall down.

On my glass.

Some people suggest to me In jest not glass the backside word should be used.

Not for me that replacement word for that part of my anatomy.

To be or not to be no say I to a pub Shakespeare that word that rhymes with pass is not to be used by me..

Not for you drunken bum shaking your pool spear at me will I mention that part of my anatomy.

If this was old England a place with different cues.

They would banish you pointing with raised finger to a far queue.

After a challenge to my honour and one game of pool.

With a quick turn of phrase my unsaid part rises of bar stool. 

That was enough for me.

The bar room scribe in me and my anatomy.

Maybe we should have talked about astronomy.

With certainty and dignity.

Time to leave the Pear & Fig.

Head back to my digs.       (Digs my home my accommodation)

My home with no Gnomes in the garden.

My happy crash pad.

With nothing sad not even a cold shoulder or hot tongue abusing me.

Just for lucky me a hot meal cooked with love, Italian parsley, rosemary and fresh garden thyme.

Can’t find anything else that might rhyme.

I’ve run out of time.

To add more lines. 

To the other’s with poetry on chordie. I doth my hat to you in praise.

With all my twist and strange turns of phrase.

I wouldn’t be surprised if you want me to burn and put my body in an urn.

Die on stage and leave this page.                               



( Digs is a slightly old fashioned term, for student accommodation or military use of civilian lodgings which are traditionally known as "digs".  Actors and musos on tour would also use the term "digs" if staying at a cheap hotel or bed & breakfast house. Here in NZ some nowadays use it as a name for their home my digs )

Re: Last Light Reflections

I understood it all Pete, and laughed at the double entendre, pool spear...ha ha ha! May your parsons nose enjoy the green grass while the good weather lasts.     

Ask not what Chordie can do for you, but what you can do for Chordie.

Re: Last Light Reflections

pete did you write this after the pub?(that might explain quite a lot.)
no seriously excellent writing again.
I am enjoying the whole conversation,although i feel like a voyeur
but then so many chordians are,read but dont contribute.     

The King Of Audio Torture

Re: Last Light Reflections

Cheers Phill and EB thank you for your comments and giving this post a butcher's hook.  EB reading Phill and Mojos poetic words full of good humour has made this turn into a very  entertaining exercise. Reading my bits, it does look like I was scotch mist but ever since my lungs have run out of collar and cuff, I have had to leave the turps alone.  I guess writing my last add on to this post, writing something around a person's aversion to using the word for bottle and glass is a bit strange but hopefully it gave people a laugh. I was trying to write it a little bit in a Elizabethan, Shakespeare style but didn’t have enough knowledge of those words or way of using them in a sentence. Trying to educate myself I went down to the library today to read up on Willy Shakespeare and  was surprised to learn that he invented many of the words that he used in his plays. Shakespeare is credited with contributing more new words to the English language than any other single person – approximately 2,000. I  always thought all his words were the standard way people spoke in the Elizabethan era until now. I am hoping now someone else might have some clever words they might want to add to this. So far this has been a fun experience for me. Thank you chordie for indulging me.     

Re: Last Light Reflections

I hail from land of Robin Hood
Maidens are fair and the beer is good
Where the major oak not minor spruce
Hid Robin from the hangmans noose
Ayup mi duck a common greeting
The happy sound of good friends meeting
And Peatle I extend those words to you
Halfway round this globe so blue
Amazed by YouTube video when I dared to look
Wishing you would write a book
A best seller it would stand apart
With words that come straight from your heart.     

Thick as two short planks

Re: Last Light Reflections

keepitreal wrote:

I hail from land of Robin Hood
Maidens are fair and the beer is good
Where the major oak not minor spruce
Hid Robin from the hangmans noose
Ayup mi duck a common greeting
The happy sound of good friends meeting
And Peatle I extend those words to you
Halfway round this globe so blue
Amazed by YouTube video when I dared to look
Wishing you would write a book
A best seller it would stand apart
With words that come straight from your heart.

Cheers Keep It Real and thank you I enjoyed that.

I am not that  sure if I wrote a book.

It would get a look.

Be read by one  or no one.

Maybe when the sun it  disappears on winters  night.

People could use said books to keep the  fire alight.

Friends of Robin Hood the good people of Sherwood

Could use it instead of wood.

The heat from said fire.

Could be used to heat up Maid Marion’s  Fryer.

Down at the Tuck Inn.

When there people could  try her delicious fare, Rabbit and Hare

And a duck dish called Friar Tuck.

Opps.  I should have said  Fryer Duck.

I don’t want as a result of my slip of the tongue.

The Sheriff of Nottingham chasing me.

Whilst  enjoying ones self at the Tuck Inn

if one has an urgent need a call of nature.

Don’t worry there is nice clean little  potty.

Her little john.

In a room out the back.     

Re: Last Light Reflections

you guys are all brilliant in your poems     

Your vision is not limited by what your eye can see, but what your mind can imagine.
Make your life count, and the world will be a better place because you tried.

"Use the talents you possess, for the woods would be very silent if no birds sang except only the the best." - Henry Van Dyke

Re: Last Light Reflections

Peatle Jville wrote:
keepitreal wrote:

I hail from land of Robin Hood
Maidens are fair and the beer is good
Where the major oak not minor spruce
Hid Robin from the hangmans noose
Ayup mi duck a common greeting
The happy sound of good friends meeting
And Peatle I extend those words to you
Halfway round this globe so blue
Amazed by YouTube video when I dared to look
Wishing you would write a book
A best seller it would stand apart
With words that come straight from your heart.

Cheers Keep It Real and thank you I enjoyed that.

I am not that  sure if I wrote a book.

It would get a look.

Be read by one  or no one.

Maybe when the sun it  disappears on winters  night.

People could use said books to keep the  fire alight.

Friends of Robin Hood the good people of Sherwood

Could use it instead of wood.

The heat from said fire.

Could be used to heat up Maid Marion’s  Fryer.

Down at the Tuck Inn.

When there people could  try her delicious fare, Rabbit and Hare

And a duck dish called Friar Tuck.

Opps.  I should have said  Fryer Duck.

I don’t want as a result of my slip of the tongue.

The Sheriff of Nottingham chasing me.

Whilst  enjoying ones self at the Tuck Inn

if one has an urgent need a call of nature.

Don’t worry there is nice clean little  potty.

Her little john.

In a room out the back.

Pete...you scraped a few bones on that one... still giggling     

Ask not what Chordie can do for you, but what you can do for Chordie.