Topic: Joan The Draw Bridge Operator

......Totally fictitious poem, any representation or resemblance of any person, alive or deceased, is purely coincidental......

JOAN THE DRAW BRIDGE OPERATOR
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Joan the draw bridge operator, 'got a big long face like a horse,(I say just like Mr. Ed!)
Joan the draw bridge operator, 'got a big long face like a horse,
'breath's bad, real bad, stronger than any military force....

Joan the draw bridge operator, need to cover her head with a bag, ( probably 2 in case the first one tear, I SAY!)
Joan the draw bridge operator, need to cover her head with a bag,
she a mean coss eyed, bucked toothed, broom-haired hag.....

Joan the draw bridge operator, you's a pancake bootied witch, (flat-a-tat-tat, so very true, WOOO!)
Joan the draw bridge operator, you's a pancake bootied witch,
Here she come, she scarin' me, please someone! turn off the light switch...

Joan the draw bridge operator, face like a yak, quick!somebody get the sack ( with a real strong rope at the bottom, URRRGH!)
Joan the draw bridge operator, face like a yak, quick!somebody get the sack,
Old gal need an attitude adjustment, karma gonna give her a whack!......

Joan the draw bridge operator, never learnt her rights and wrongs ( daryl, daryl, daryl, DOUGH!)
Joan the draw bridge operator, never learnt her rights and wrongs,
Shouldn't have ticked off the man, the man who write mean songs..........

Pppppppphhhhhhheewwwww, nayyyy, nayyyyy!!!!!!! ( Horse sounds)

Give everything but up.

Re: Joan The Draw Bridge Operator

Jeez - what did the poor woman say ?!

"Don't play what's there, play what's not there." Miles Davis

Re: Joan The Draw Bridge Operator

Do you plan on putting this to music. It certainly could be a beautiful lyric. Perhaps something in a minor 7th flavor?

Thanks for the laugh.

I used to be disgusted; now I try to be amused.
Elvis Costello

Re: Joan The Draw Bridge Operator

geoaguiar wrote:

Do you plan on putting this to music. It certainly could be a beautiful lyric. Perhaps something in a minor 7th flavor?

Thanks for the laugh.

I play it  in basic 12 bar dirty blues in E. I have lots of fun with this one. It's often almost impossible to get through the entire song without laughing all over my microphone

Give everything but up.

Re: Joan The Draw Bridge Operator

SouthPaw41L wrote:
geoaguiar wrote:

Do you plan on putting this to music. It certainly could be a beautiful lyric. Perhaps something in a minor 7th flavor?

Thanks for the laugh.

I play it  in basic 12 bar dirty blues in E. I have lots of fun with this one. It's often almost impossible to get through the entire song without laughing all over my microphone

Again, thanks for sharing. I hadn't thought of a blues take on that.

I used to be disgusted; now I try to be amused.
Elvis Costello

Re: Joan The Draw Bridge Operator

hi toney this one sounds a scream how about a recording,well done....stay cool

love is life ,life is for love,keep a true heart and live life to the full....stay cool

Re: Joan The Draw Bridge Operator

Thats pretty darn funny. Hope I never make you mad!

Everything is bad including me
But being bad is good policy
Reverend Horton Heat

Re: Joan The Draw Bridge Operator

this is hysterical!  I loved it!

Re: Joan The Draw Bridge Operator

StranSongs wrote:

Jeez - what did the poor woman say ?!

Fictitious means it was made up from imagination, not from an actual experience.

Give everything but up.

Re: Joan The Draw Bridge Operator

KarmaCarmie wrote:

this is hysterical!  I loved it!

Thanks so much, I laughed the entire time writing this made up story.....

Give everything but up.

Re: Joan The Draw Bridge Operator

selso wrote:

Thats pretty darn funny. Hope I never make you mad!

No need to worry, you're way too cool of a dude to ever make me angry.

Peace and Guitars,
SouthPaw41L

Give everything but up.

Re: Joan The Draw Bridge Operator

"Fictitious means it was made up from imagination, not from an actual experience."

I have just reported this to the Oxford English Dictionary. It has been accepted as the first proof of irony in the USA !

As finders fee I get a free ticket to Disneyland.

"Don't play what's there, play what's not there." Miles Davis

Re: Joan The Draw Bridge Operator

StranSongs wrote:

"Fictitious means it was made up from imagination, not from an actual experience."

I have just reported this to the Oxford English Dictionary. It has been accepted as the first proof of irony in the USA !

As finders fee I get a free ticket to Disneyland.

Thanks for the submission. Be sure to send me your travel itinerary and I'll be more than happy to tell you exactly where to go..........

Give everything but up.

Re: Joan The Draw Bridge Operator

SouthPaw41L wrote:
StranSongs wrote:

"Fictitious means it was made up from imagination, not from an actual experience."

I have just reported this to the Oxford English Dictionary. It has been accepted as the first proof of irony in the USA !

As finders fee I get a free ticket to Disneyland.

Thanks for the submission. Be sure to send me your travel itinerary and I'll be more than happy to tell you exactly where to go..........

Thats even funnier!

Everything is bad including me
But being bad is good policy
Reverend Horton Heat

Re: Joan The Draw Bridge Operator

I'm very experienced , unfortunately, with hecklers......

Give everything but up.

Re: Joan The Draw Bridge Operator

You shoot your audience ?!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Heckler_%26_Koch_MP5

"Don't play what's there, play what's not there." Miles Davis