1 Topic by goonie1 (edited by goonie1 2008-05-21 14:51:51)

  • Registered: 2008-04-18
  • Posts: 14

Topic: my written songs

I love to write jesus music.  but after my girlfriend broke up with me i started to write this song

INVISIBLE TO YOU

                                               Dm               G                   Am         
                                               Im lying here, just staring at the ceiling.
                                       Em                          Am        D                                    
                                        Thoughts of you run through my head.
                                         Dm                              G          C        Am
                                       But when I close my eyes, I see you and cry.
                                                      D                          Em      Am
                                                       That’s why I lie awake tonight.


                                                        G                            Dsus    D
                                                         Though you don’t seem to care,
                                                                      C                 Em
                                                                You look right through me.
                                                                      E                  F#m        E         Am
                                                                     And you walk away.
                                                   G          Dsus  D    Am             Em
                                                   If only you knew, who I really am,
                                              C                  F#m   Em  F#m      Em  Am
                                              But to you, im invisible,                 invisible.

                                                   Dm           Am        G               D
                                                   As I watch you, you never even notice,
                                      Am         Em       Am  G           C            D
                                     You don’t see me cry. But why would you care.
                                                           E               D        C
                                                          Im just an average guy.
                                        F                                        F#m    A
                                         Never had the guts to say, I love you.

                                             G                         Dsus      D
                                              Though you don’t seem to care,
                                                      C              Em     
                                                You look right through me,
                                                      E                   F#m       E     Am
                                                      And you walk away.
                                          G          Dsus D     Am            Em
                                           If only you knew, who I really am,
                                  C                  F#m    Em        F#m       Em  Am
                                    But to you, im invisible,                   invisible.

                                     
                                     
                                 

                                       B                     Dm
                                      You don’t know, what you’re missing,
                                     A                    Em         A
                                    ‘Cause I have a heart of gold.
                                     Dm                                     D
                                      But one of these days, you’ll think of me,
                                               C                                         A
                                               In the same way, I thought of you.
                                         G                    D                 C
                                          And you’ll see, that it’s just too late,
                                                          E
                                                          Im over you..
                                                     D                   G       C
                                              Now you’re the one alone tonight,
                                                              F              Em
                                                     And you regret it all,
                                           D                            G         C
                                          Wishing you could go back in time,
                                                         F                E    D
                                                   To change your mistake.
   
                                                  G                        Dsus      D
                                                  Though you don’t seem to care,
                                                         C                 Em
                                                         You look right through me,
                                                       E                   F#m        E        Am
                                                       And you walk away.
                                          G          Dsus  D   Am         Em
                                          If only you knew, who I really am,
                                      C                  F#m  Em  F#m       Em  Am
                                     But to you, im invisible,             invisible.


Solo to end:

2 Reply by Russell_Harding (edited by Russell_Harding 2008-05-05 21:34:25)

  • From: A black hole in deep space
  • Registered: 2007-10-28
  • Posts: 7,862

Re: my written songs

Its a song of lament the words are heartfelt the chord changes are scattered all over the page it has  potential but you need to get some help with the chopro formating to really present it in the light you want its a good idea just needs a little help with the chopro to put the chords where they belong good luck with it smile

"Growing old is not for sissies"

Russell_Harding's Website

  • 3CF
  • 3CF
  • Member
  • Offline
  • From: NJ USA
  • Registered: 2008-04-17
  • Posts: 37

Re: my written songs

Hi looks good. 3CF

Use what talents you possess; the woods would be very silent if no birds sang there except those that sang best.
Henry Van Dyke

3CF's Website

  • From: The Land Of Song
  • Registered: 2007-12-10
  • Posts: 5,649

Re: my written songs

hi goonie 1,

love the words, the metre seems perfect till you try playing it, at first i thought it was a blues number, but i couldnt get the beat, tried c/w and reggie, please put it on myspace cos i think it's a good one and i'd love to know how it goes.

phill

Ask not what Chordie can do for you, but what you can do for Chordie.

Phill Williams's Website

  • Registered: 2007-04-03
  • Posts: 3,489

Re: my written songs

Lovey  lovely song Goonie one.

I cannot say whats wrong with the chords. Why? Cos i dont know enough about them .

BUT,  how Just by playing  someones chords to songs can others get the melody the song
writer had in there heads.  Maybe im just a complete eejit. LOL.

Ah well I love the lyrics. Hope to hear the recording.

  Old Doll.

Why Blend in with the Crowd ? When you were made to stand out !
  • From: A black hole in deep space
  • Registered: 2007-10-28
  • Posts: 7,862

Re: my written songs

Russell_Harding wrote:

Its a song of lament the words are heartfelt the chord changes are scattered all over the page it has  potential but you need to get some help with the chopro formating to really present it in the light you want its a good idea just needs a little help with the chopro to put the chords where they belong good luck with it smile

It just dawned on me you didn't try to in chopro you forgot to hit the RETURN OR ENTER KEY this will move the cursur to the next line in the paragraph lile this
enter
enter
enter try this next time and the chords will be where you want them
ok?
no kidding
it
works smile

"Growing old is not for sissies"

Russell_Harding's Website

7 Reply by goonie1 (edited by goonie1 2008-05-21 14:57:14)

  • Registered: 2008-04-18
  • Posts: 14

Re: my written songs

so i finally figured out how to fix the chord misplacement, so now you all can play it more right than you were before. now about recording, this is a song that will be sung by my friend Gaby and she's a pretty good singer so ill let you all know when i get it finished....ill also be posting more of my songs soon so be on the lookout.  big_smile

  • From: United States
  • Registered: 2008-05-21
  • Posts: 24

Re: my written songs

WOW i loved the lyrics...it kinda reminded me of taylor swifts teardrops on my guitar.  i agree with the others on the formatting though...its a little scattered.  pretty tho wink

*<3*jammingurl93*<3*
  • From: Almancil, Algarve, Portugal
  • Registered: 2006-09-02
  • Posts: 6,198

Re: my written songs

Hi Goonie,

Like most others I loved the lyrics to your song and agree that there is a lot of potential but it is not helped with having each line starting raggedly about halfway across the page and unless I am reading it wrong every verse has a different chord sequence which will mean a different melody. I do however feel that with a bit of work this could be a very good song.

I would like to hear a recording of this song, in fact, I would love you to prove my comments wrong and have a great song just as it stands.

Thank you,

Roger

"Do, or do not; there is no try"

Roger Guppy's Website

  • Registered: 2008-04-18
  • Posts: 14

Re: my written songs

Roger Guppy wrote:

Hi Goonie,

Like most others I loved the lyrics to your song and agree that there is a lot of potential but it is not helped with having each line starting raggedly about halfway across the page and unless I am reading it wrong every verse has a different chord sequence which will mean a different melody. I do however feel that with a bit of work this could be a very good song.

I would like to hear a recording of this song, in fact, I would love you to prove my comments wrong and have a great song just as it stands.

Thank you,

Roger

you are right that the melody is a bit scattered but it still sounds pretty good..this is only the original chords though. the newer version i did i would have to put on tabs...i am almost finished with the recording so i'll let you know when im done

  • From: derbyshire
  • Registered: 2007-05-17
  • Posts: 2,843

Re: my written songs

hi goonie a great theme to the song,just needs arranging into verses instead of split lines,well done ....stay cool

love is life ,life is for love,keep a true heart and live life to the full....stay cool

daddycool's Website