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My daughter sent me this one:

A man walks into a restaurant with a full-grown ostrich behind him.
The waitress asks for their orders. The man says, "A hamburger, fries and a coke," and turns to the ostrich, "What's yours?"
"I'll have the same," says the ostrich.
A short time later the waitress returns with the order.
"That will be £9.40 please," she says and the man reaches into his pocket and pulls out the exact amount for payment.
The next day, the man and the ostrich come again and the man says, "A hamburger, fries, and a coke."
The ostrich says, "I'll have the same."
Again the man reaches into his pocket and pays with the exact amount.
For a while this becomes routine until the two enter again later in the week. "The usual?" asks the waitress.
"No, this time it's a treat, so I will have a steak, baked potato, and salad," says the man.
" Yep! Same," says the ostrich.
Shortly the waitress brings the order and says, "That will be £32.62."
Once again the man pulls the exact amount out of his pocket and places it on the table.
The waitress can't hold back her curiosity any longer. "Excuse me, sir.
How do you manage to always come up with the exact money from your pocket every time?"
"Well," says the man, "several years ago I was clearing the attic and found an old lamp, when I rubbed it a Genie appeared and offered me two wishes.
My first wish was that if I ever had to pay for anything, I would just put my hand in my pocket and the right amount of money would always be there."
"That's brilliant!" says the waitress. "Most people would wish for a couple of million pounds or something, but you'll always be as rich as you want for as long as you live!"
"That's right. Whether it's a pint of milk or a Rolls Royce, the exact money is always there," says the man.
The waitress asks, "But, sir, what's with the ostrich?"
The man sighs, pauses, and replies, "My second wish was for a tall bird with a big bum and long legs who agrees with everything I say."

Roger

Hi Lieven,

I can only speak for myself and I am very reluctant to write a harsh critical comment on anyone's song. Whatever I may feel, someone has put a lot of time and effort into writing and posting their song and they think it is good enough, so in reality it is probably just my interpretion of what is put down that is at fault. What I think is wonderful someone else will think is rubbish and vise versa, it is all a matter of opinion and taste.

There are also so many songs and poems being posted now as opposed to a year ago that it is impossible to read, play and comment on every one.

On saying that I have been know to write privately to an individual if I think that they have done something horribly wrong or I can help in some way.

Roger

Hi Helena and John White,

I have just given this a run through and I like the result. The lyrics can very easily transposed to the male perspective and I like the chord sequence particularly the C, F, D of the 12th line.

Well done to both of you.

Roger

Beautiful, wonderful lyrics Helena. I cannot wait for the music and the recording. Please!!

Roger

Hi bimbo,

Welcome to Chordie. I am a little unsure exactly what you are asking but I guess that it is tabs that you have seen, if so this link will take to an excellent repy from an earlier posting:  http://www.chordie.com/forum/viewtopic.php?id=4861

If I have misunderstood and you are still uncertain please post again.

Roger

The Cruel War - Peter, Paul and Mary

Hi Jerry,

I have spoken to Per about this and he has found an error in the database. I have checked and found that the chord is now correct in the Songs section and in the original songs from the Songwriting section of the forum. It is still incorrect on the Chord Chart however and that is being looked into.

Thank you for pointing this out.

Roger

Well done James,

You have really done the game of golf justice with this one. The lyrics are clever and witty and the 7th chords give the right timbre to the song. You have definitely scored an ace with this one.

Roger

Hey Cytania,

It sounds as though you want to be perfect, just like me

I have resolved to learn Quando, Quando, Quando for a game on the forum and I think that is enough.

Roger

I would like to wish everyone, from Per, the founder of Chordie, to celine_17, the newest member, a Very Happy and Prosperous New Year.

Crickey that is 145,043 wishes no wonder my voice is hoarse

Roger

Puff, The Magic Dragon - Peter,Paul and the lovely Mary Travers

Nice one Jeff,

Unfortunately the only Georgia I know is a young lady I went to college with but enough said about that.

Unfortunately I have never visited America and I am afraid I will have to win the lottery first to be able to visit all the places and people that I want to see, but that did not stop me enjoying your song. I am looking forward to hearing the recording now.

Thanks,

Roger