(1 replies, posted in Poems)

Hi Judy, this is really beautiful. feels like a classic love poem. I particularly love your first verse; it draws me in immediately with its simplicity and beauty; so relatable.  nice write!


(3 replies, posted in Poems)

very nice; I think they'd make sweet song lyrics!  particularly like the verses:

If I could no longer see
When the light in my eyes would leave me
I would still be looking for you
And I would find you too
If I could no longer see…..

If I could no longer speak
When the sound of my voice was to weak
In spite of my pain
I would whisper your name
If I could no longer speak….

beautiful! - T


(9 replies, posted in Poems)

very fun; very Dr. Seuss-like! loved it


(2 replies, posted in Poems)

Judy, I LOVE this!  wonderful!.... (both posts of it!)  smile  keep writing!


(2 replies, posted in Poems)

Beautiful, Judy.  Very touching.


(1 replies, posted in Poems)

hard to focus on what was had, rather than what was lost.  this is a very sad and touching write.


(3 replies, posted in Poems)

Don't think there's anything difficult to understand about this.  It is a wonderfully honest, clear-cut description of what we all seek.  It may APPEAR that others have all that "life shine", the love, peace and joy, but trust me, we're ALL searching for something.  I think this is a very encouraging piece of "self-talk", especially at the end.  Nicely written!  Please share more..... Best, -T  smile


(2 replies, posted in Poems)

Hi Lane, both pieces seem sad, but I must admit to not fully understanding their meaing.  would like to understand them better.  Perhaps they might come together as one?  Love your writing style.  Best -T


(5 replies, posted in Poems)

Im not at all sure what djrt04 is referring to in his reply to your post; I sense it was simply placed in the wrong location.

In reading this again, I am once again struck by the open and raw true confessions of the piece.  Moving and elloquent.  another quality write!


(5 replies, posted in Poems)

Who among us has not been plagued by hate, greed, envy, lust, self-recrimination?  Who among us has not felt unprepared & alone?  Who among us has not passed on opportunities to do the right thing for ourselves or others?  Who among us doesn’t long for someone else’s bounty, including the freedom we “perceive"  they have?

“The lamp is on, bright light sweeps" …. What a wonderful, descriptive line! With just one short line you’ve set the entire scene for me of one sitting alone, baron room, hard wood chair, pendulum of light swinging back & forth; being pummeled with questions.  But we learn that the writer is being questioned by one’s own heart; imprisoned by conscience.  The bright conclusion here, however, is the realization that we hold the keys to the prison within ourselves – the first steps to change and freedom from self-loathing.  Once this level of awareness has been established, I suppose learning how to truly utilize those keys would be the ultimate path to freedom!

Wonderful, wonderful write FF! Please keep sharing your deep and thoughtful insights.  Thank you


(2 replies, posted in Poems)

Hi JJ, you hit it on the head in the last few lines: "From sin we learned and may teach some" -- anyone who has walked this planet for any length of time, is bound to have mistakes and regrets.  Strong and productive are those who can recognize them, learn from them, and move forward.  Blessed are those who can dismiss the comments of the ones who pass judgement ("Many saw our faults and will not let us go, Forgiveness seems so far away.").

Wonderful write; keep it going! -T


(1 replies, posted in Poems)

very lovely!  smile
regards, ~T


(2 replies, posted in Poems)

Hi FF, there is indeed a frightening quality to this piece.  Interesting; the hate/love for the monkey is nicely described; which is really a quality within oneself which is reasonably detested, yet loved at the same time, clearly unreasonably.
I think you've made some changes to the middle, which I like, but must admit to preferring the old ending better.
be well, best regards, ~T


(4 replies, posted in Poems)

I like this: simple, direct, to the point, and sweet - what some of the best songs are made of.  has one other quality: 'connectability'... reminds me of someone special.  keep writing! ~T


(14 replies, posted in Poems)

In looking back at some older posts, I came back to this one and remembered the kind of wonderful heartfelt writing that drew me to the Poems section to begin with.  I think its a very relatable piece of writing.  I'm wondering if chords were ever put to it?  good stuff


(9 replies, posted in Poems)

Hi Selso, nice poem, sad story, the makings of a touching song.
best line:
"We tried to play house
Without building a home"
good stuff...keep writing! -T


(2 replies, posted in Poems)

Hi tommydone, this is lovely, I could hear it as a song.  I understand completely. -t-rex


(4 replies, posted in Poems)

Hey, don't underestimate the hillbillies; you'll have them all in sloppy tears, crying in their beer!  Besides, who says ya need to please the hillbillies!?  Anyway, glad I sparked some inspiration for that bridge; no biggie on the credit, just go with it! take care, -T


(4 replies, posted in Poems)

Lane, wow, this is terrific.  emotionally charged, even without your background.  I don't think it needs a thing, however, if you wanted to add a bridge, maybe you could add something like:

And when the thunder stops
I’m left with rain
Like an angel’s teardrops
Her life’s refrain

Quality stuff! -T-Rex


(2 replies, posted in Poems)

this is absolutely beautiful, will make a wonderful wonderful song; look fwd to hearing it! -T


(2 replies, posted in Poems)

I really like this Phil! great write! -T


(32 replies, posted in Songwriting)

Wow Amy, both of your songs on soundclick are terrific!  I am very impressed by your voice!  Wouldn't be surprised to find you singing in Chelsea or the down in the Village in some little nightclub in NYC!  I've always wished to have the ability to carry a tune, but wasn't blessed with vocals, so I stick to poetry...:/....Please continue writing and singing...you really have something there!  best, -T

A simple love story that's simply beautiful!  Sweet, to the point, lyrical; very nice.  I think you'll find you're not the only hopeless romantic here in the Poems section....Welcome! -T-Rex


(5 replies, posted in Poems)

Hi Phil, I really like this; the pain, the tenderness, the love, the desire to get started working on repairing what's been chipped away -- it all comes through.  When two have a relationship that's worth repairing, that 'One Word' will happen and open the diologue.  All that pride and stubborness that get in the way of that "One word, one simple word", wastes so much time that's better spent loving!  I hope it all works out in your favor, good luck! -T
PS...great therapy, this writing stuff, eh?


(2 replies, posted in Poems)

I understand what you're trying to convey here and I like it; nice concept.  I'd like to see it elaborated on further.  nice write - T